When you can't put your prayers into words, God hears your heart

Hi 20

So I'm officially old now :D here I share photos of my friends and I two days ago, when they give me a little surprise.

 

 

My girls behind this are...

Tiara Syahriza @tiarasyahriza

Mean sometimes. Goofy all the time, always bright our mood up. She's single by the way^^

Fien Halima Julyan Tino @fientino

A very warm-hearted person amongst us. The most galau 'bout anything as well.

Elisa Rahmi.

Unconsciously tend to bring herself weird n funny at a time =D thankU to her we took good pics by her phone

 Anggraeni Mardianti @anggraeni_m

Proud to be the Borneo. Has a veeeeeeeery interesting, hilarious way to speak.

 Fadhilah Syarifuddin @fadhilasya

Easy going personality. Good reseller olshop. Single^^

Intan Tri Dini Lestari @IntanTDL

The most potentially marry-soon amongst us, has no boyfriend though. Just send me a message for her number^^

Siti Zahra.

Has a mom-like feel. Very simple-easy going person^^

 Safrina Darayani Wahyudi @safrindaaa

Single. Franky immature person as I am. Our berbi antagonis.

Arini Raydian @ariniraydian

Olshopaholic. Tough outside, mellow inside. My 'stay-strong' partner.

 It was the main, core, highlight things in a year because only one day you receive (probably) the most sincere wishes from your surrounding. May I be healthy, more and more patience. Thank you so much my lord Allah swt.

Stay positive \m/ stay strong

One step for my 20th

Umur 20 dan masih mikirin diri sendiri? Kelaut aja

If you know what I mean... :) I'll be twenty in a less two months, there are dozen of things always bothers me about being an adult. Don't you feel the same? I must start selecting what is good and what is not. Over this one year and half I've spend most of time taking care of someone's feeling, took more than a lot of efforts... exhausted... tired being tired, I barely feel happy. But, after-like a lifetime consideration-take a lot of thoughts that all not gonna worth my pains, I'll take the risk, I have to let myself having its worth, I have to let God carry out the miracles, yes I have to leave. I don't know that choosing a good and leaving the badness is this hard, especially when you have to face it with no one understand how hard it is. I always believe people have this one turning point that will change their life lead to their right or wrong, if that what's happening to me now, no matter what I have to make it right. If any other burdensome comes I hope it would not as horrible as this one. I'm not gonna feel miserable for leaving badness, am I? If I feel lil bit miserable in fact it is alright. With all this God teaching me how to poor and taking care myself at a time. I hope with this I'll be more wiser and of course mature. I'll learn how to love myself, my family more than anything... literally. If I can face it wisely I think I'll be ready for my 20th.

A Beautiful Mind

 He saw the world in a way no one could have imagine

The winner of 4 Academy Award ( Best Picture, Best Director, Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Supporting Actress, Jennifer Connely), this movie indeed is a brilliant just like the character they playing John Forbes Nash, the Nobel laureate in economics. Hate to admit it that i'm way too late to watch this movie. I forgot when I first saw the trailer, officially it was on 2001. I knew that the main character is a mathematician and paranoid schizophrenic. On this case John Nash starts his paranoid schizophrenia symptoms while he's in collage. A schizophrenic are often frigid, rarely smiles, mostly like an introvert. But the differ is schizophrenia undergo delusions or hallucinations.

The guy with blonde hair right there was his first delusional friend, named Charles Herman (Paul Bettany), a roommate. Charles is really nice guy with British accent.

Now, here is the part when John finally making a new theory when he and his fellow graduate students (Josh Lucas as Martin Hansen, Adam Goldberg as Sol,  Anthony Rapp as Bender) discuss how to approach a group of women at bar. A very genius point of view. By this theory John Nash offered an appointment at MIT, with Sol and Bender.

Past few years John become a code breaker. This clip show when John get invited to Pentagon. After that he begin conceit about his talent. Then he meet his second delusional person named William Parcher (Ed Harris) as a supervisor of the united states department of defense. He entrust John to be their classified code breaker, to look for pattern in magazines and newspapers in order to thwart a soviet plot.

The beautiful Jennifer Connely attracts him with his role as Alicia Larde by this clip. And she is the only one who can solve the question that John has made. After that she ask him to dinner, so the two fall in love. They get married and have a boy.

John meet his third delusional person, a child named Marcee (Vivian Cardone) she's Charles's niece, before he marry Alicia.

His schizophrenia getting worst each day. First because he has hallucination that his work with William Parcher is discovered by soviet. He turns off all light in his house, he frighten his wife so Alicia make the call to Dr. Rosen (Christopher Plummer). John thought that Dr. Rosen is a Rusian agent.

John is eventually released from psychiatric facility after get a course of insulin shock therapy. He lives jobless. He frustated with the side effects of antipsychotic, he secretly stop taking it, that's why he relapse and meet parcher again (which he forced John to finish his task as a classified code breaker).

On this clip he try Alicia to bath the baby, but because of his relapse he  let (thought Charles is there to take care of the baby) the baby sinking at the tube. Alicia flees with baby after calling Dr. Rosen. But unexpectedly John stops her and realize that Marcee never gets old so she can't be real.

John refuses to taking medications again, he believes there must be another way, he think based on a logic like a true mathematician. This is the dramatic part, after he endangers his family Alicia not steps back or sue a divorce but she stays, decides to support him patiently :') I cried at this part.

John can't live without doing anything. He really want to teach again, so he meet his old friend Martin Hansen who has become the Princeton mathematics department. He having a rough time there where people sees him as a genius lunatic, because he talks alone (his delusional friends). But then he learn to ignore them (Charles, Marcee and Parcher), just like diet of mind. Years pass John has the privilege of teaching again.

In 1994, he goes to win the Nobel memorial prize in economics for his game theory. At the end he still (always) can see Charles, Marcee and Parcher.

Fin. Go watch if you haven't, I will never get bored to rewatch this movie, will be one of my favorite of all time. Stay Positive \m/ Stay Strong guys!

2013

Hi guys it's been a very looooooooong time since the last time I'm trying to make this blog not so boring (means: since the last post.). well first of all HAPPY NEW YEARS 2013! it's been a violently remarkable year, the whole year for me hahaha. But glad we all survived the apocalypse. So i'd like to let you hear something about my life when i'm not around ;

First. What take me so long to posting again?
Is because I'm purposely decreasing my internet access. Lately I always bring my laptop to campus every friday and some of my friends notice that, they kinda worried and one of them asked me "go buy a modem, how can you work on the resume?" here's the deal, I'm very aware of my bad internet-consuming habit, so once I get the access in my room I hardly stop then the resume or any assignments are hell away to be done. I have a spare time on friday rather than do nothing I prefer spent the day at campus, wifi-ing, see my friends. I can learn to manage my time more anyway.

Second. How was my new year eve?
It was good ^^ my boyfriend took me to his meeting with his few fellows and seniors from his seafaring academy. I went with him and his father at 9 and stay until around twelve and half. It was simply delighting new year eve. Because I can spend the night with him, and had a chance to know he's so lucky to get into the academy. They have a very tight of kinship.

Third. What my resolutions for this year?
Here are my top three: 1. I have to get some scholarship, must! 2. Keep healthy. Because I have a severe gastric problem, like once in three months I must go through it. What a tiresome :'( 3. More saving. No matter how, I have to gain money for more saving. I tried take a few short story contest or enrolling my short story to magazine but didn't work out, they haven't contact me until now :(

So far those what I need to tell you guys. Keep bunching with me. I'd visiting more and do some stuff. Stay positive \m/ Stay strong.